How To Use Doubt As Fuel For Success

Has anyone ever doubted you?

Have you ever been in a situation where your parents, friends, past lovers, or colleagues have looked at you and not seen your value? Have they underestimated you? I've been there, and I know how it feels.

But here's the thing: doubt is your fuel.

But this fuel isn’t for a secret, personal vendetta.

This experience of having doubters is not a setback but a source of strength. It’s a resource for you to tap into when you feel like quitting on the journey to achieving your dreams. If used correctly, it's a testament to your resilience and determination.

Having haters is a gift.

Here’s how to make people sorry for doubting you.

Reframing “Revenge”

Most people see revenge as the need to retaliate against someone or something.

The definition of revenge is:

“the action of inflicting hurt or harm on someone for an injury or wrong suffered at their hands.” 

But are you really seeking to do that? Is that what you dreamt about as a kid? To live your life to inflict harm on others?

For the people who aren’t psychopaths, I’m guessing you didn’t fantasize about that growing up.

Revenge shouldn’t be about getting angry. And it shouldn’t be about making someone your sworn enemy to get “even” or proving something to them.

Revenge is an opportunity for you to get better.

If you do feel the urge to strike back at them, that’s feedback that you care more about their opinions than your own.

It’s clear that your validation depends on the approval of others and that you’re hyper-focused on what others think and say.

This is a bad position to be in.

Don’t Get Mad Or Even. Get This Instead

Getting mad is for the weak.

Anyone can lose control and throw tantrums, but that doesn’t help you.

And someone aspiring to get “even” sets themselves up for colossal heartbreak. Why? Because by deciding to get even, you’ve voluntarily chosen to live your life for someone else–not you.

Your life automatically becomes driven to win against someone else who isn’t even thinking about you. That behavior is pathetic.

So, what do you do instead? Switch your focus.

The homie Frank Sinatra said it best:

Don’t get revenge. Don’t get even. Get success.

If that’s your definition of victory, then lean into it. You want to switch your focus from them to you.

Focus on:

-You
-Your goals
-The life you want to live
-The person you want to be

Regardless of the presence of doubters, your focus should always be on your personal growth and the pursuit of your dreams. This unwavering focus is what will drive you forward, regardless of the challenges you face.

Use Their Doubt As Rocket Fuel

In the past, I’ve spoken about the now-infamous “List of Hate.”

The list of hate is not for us to live in a state of hatred or to fulfill a vendetta against those who doubted us. Not at all. Its purpose is to help us persevere toward our goals when we want to quit.

Pursuing our goals and dreams is hard.

It’s not all sunshine and rainbows, and it’s certainly not a boulevard of unbroken green lights. The journey gives never-ending setbacks, rejections, and delays that make you want to quit daily.

But when you want to throw in the towel, this is when you want to remember the words of those who doubted you.

When things get hard and you’re on the verge of quitting, remember their words:

“You’ll never make it.”

“You won’t amount to anything.”

“You’re nothing without me.”

“You’re not good enough.”

Whatever words or phrases were said to you, tap into them.

You’ll channel a new wave of energy, getting a second wind propelling you to persevere and endure.

You probably hated it when you heard their words. It most likely cut you to your core. Good. Use it as fuel.

Hate is a powerful tool. It’s like a knife. You could use the knife to spread butter on bread or stab someone to death.

But instead of living in a state of hatred, hating the person who said those words to you, you use your hate for those words and how they made you feel to help you endure toward your goals. 

This tactic is extremely powerful to ensure you don’t quit.

The BMM Takeaway

Contrary to popular belief, the ultimate revenge isn’t drinking the tears of your enemy.

The ultimate revenge is living a fulfilling life. It’s being ridiculously happy. It’s achieving your goals and dreams despite having haters and doubters who don’t support or believe in you.

Live a life that’s so good that your doubters want to be you.

It isn’t about making them cry or getting their approval.

It’s about fulfillment.

It’s you living a life where you:

-Are healthy
-Wake up happy
-Have fulfilling relationships
-Do what you love and get paid handsomely for it

Remember, if you quit and don’t achieve your goals, your doubters and haters weren’t simply doubters and haters. They were right.