How To Make Bank At The Sperm Bank

Making Bank At The Sperm Bank

Imagine making $100 every time you beat your meat.

Would you be a millionaire by now? (Or a billionaire?)

Well, it’s no joke. You can make up to $100 per sperm donation at a sperm bank if you have viable sperm.

Some clinics even offer bonuses for regular donors or for higher quality samples, potentially boosting your earnings.

So if you think you’ve got the golden goop, you could be heavily compensated.

That is…as long as you’re cool with knowing that hundreds of people are potentially your children.

Here’s how to make bank at the sperm bank, including where to find them, how to apply, and how much you can make in a month.

The Financial Realities of Donating Sperm

Donating sperm can be a surprisingly lucrative side hustle. Let’s get into the numbers. On average, sperm donors earn between $70 to $100 per donation, depending on the clinic and your location.

Some sperm banks even offer bonuses for meeting specific criteria, like having a high sperm count or donating regularly over a certain period.

Now, before you even think about it, here’s the deal: most sperm banks only allow you to donate up to twice a week. So no, you can’t go on a bender and hit up the sperm bank every day of the week.

You also cannot “stack” banks like buffs in Elden Ring. As in, you can’t go to one sperm bank on Monday and Friday but go to another on Wednesday. Sperm banks are like women, they talk to each other.

So with the 2 times per week (if you’re viable), that’s roughly 8 times a month, which puts your earnings at about $560 to $800 monthly. 

Over a year, that can add up to anywhere from $6,720 to $9,600.

And luckily, sperm banks actually want consistent donors. You won’t be weird for going in there frequently. They actually encourage it!

You can even get an extra $500 or more if you donate a certain number of times within six months.

So, the more consistent you are, the more you can potentially earn.

Where to Find Sperm Banks and How to Apply

If you’re interested in becoming a sperm donor, the first step is to find a reputable sperm bank.

Major cities typically have several clinics to choose from, and a quick online search can help you find one nearby.

Some of the most well known sperm banks include California Cryobank, Fairfax Cryobank, and Cryos International. These organizations are known for their thorough screening processes and high standards.

To apply, you’ll typically need to fill out an online application, which will ask for basic information about your health, lifestyle, and family history.

If you pass the initial screening, you’ll be invited to undergo a more comprehensive health exam, including a physical and blood tests.

Sperm banks are particularly interested in three main viability factors:

1. Sperm Count: A high sperm count is essential. Sperm banks typically look for a concentration of at least 15 million sperm per milliliter.
   

2. Sperm Motility: This refers to the movement and swimming ability of the sperm. Banks require high motility to ensure the sperm can reach and fertilize an egg effectively.
   

3. Genetic Health: Donors are screened for genetic issues that could be passed on to offspring. A clean genetic history is crucial for acceptance.

If you meet these criteria and are accepted, you’ll start making regular donations.

Keep in mind that while some sperm banks pay per donation, others may require you to complete a certain number of donations before you receive payment.

Are There Guys with 1,000 Children?

You might have heard stories about sperm donors fathering hundreds, even thousands, of children.

There’s even a documentary, The Baby God, that covers the life of a fertility doctor who secretly fathered dozens of children through his clinic.

While these cases are extreme and rare, they highlight the potential reach of sperm donation.

Most sperm banks limit the number of families that can use a single donor’s sperm to prevent this kind of situation.

Typically, a donor’s sperm is used to create 10-20 families, but the exact number can vary depending on the sperm bank’s policies and the region’s regulations. However, only about 1% of donors even reach the 10 family mark, so don’t worry too much about having hundreds of children out there.

The BMM Takeaway

Donating sperm can be a profitable side gig if you meet the criteria and are consistent with your donations.

With earnings of $70 to $100 per session, and the possibility of donating up to twice a week, it’s a way to earn extra income while helping others.

However, it’s important to understand that not everyone qualifies as a donor. And if you don’t qualify, don’t be bummed.

And remember, your sperm count and other viability factors have nothing to do with how much of a man you are. They’re just arbitrary numbers representing the amount of microscopic tadpoles in your body.

So if you think you’ve got what it takes, head to the bank and make a donation.